Monday, January 15, 2007

crawling towards the sun...

i am so grateful for the growth/change that has been taking place in my life.

i owe it ALL to God.
everything.

just looking back at my journal entries, even from the last 3 weeks, i have grown so much.
i have been changed.
i have been molded.


the most beautiful thing to me is that i know there is still more growth and change in the future.


i knew it would be hard to even get this far...
i was in such a rut.
there was so much darkness....so much sadness....so much brokenness.

i prayed to God.
i prayed for him to crush me...
i needed to be rebuilt from the ground up.
i needed some pain.
i needed some perspective.
everything was perfectly timed and planned out by the maker of the universe.

and here i am today....still such a mess, but such a beautiful mess.
still, weak but...
"i will boast all the more gladly about my weakness, so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong. "

Tuesday, January 09, 2007

burning down bridges now [scatter the ashes]

"so what was that night to you?"

"not exactly 'nothing', but close enough"





....ow.